I’ve never given the afterlife much thought before. But when you lose someone you hold dear, you can’t help but wonder where do our loved ones go after life?
Even when those I loved passed away. I didn’t feel the need to know where they were. I accepted that they were gone and that was that.
But since Mum, I spend far too much time thinking about what happens when we pass away.
It would be so easy for me to accept the idea of Heaven. I do suspect it would be a wonderful place. A place where those we loved and lost are waiting for us, somewhere free from pain and sadness. A place we can enjoy all that we loved. A place we are safe and happy.
But is this idea simply to put our grieving mind at rest? Help us to find some sense of peace about losing those dear to us.
Do we need to follow religion to believe in Heaven? Is it right to believe in this if religion is not a significant part of our life?
Or could the afterlife be the world we live in but on spirit level? This leads me to wonder if the dead even know they are dead – I think I may have watched the sixth sense too much!
Plus the thought of being surrounded by dead people freaks me out a little.
The Afterlife
I had never given the afterlife much thought before.
Signs from Loved ones
I know some people truly believe their loved ones are with them all the time, that they show themselves to them in many forms. A butterfly, or a white feather, a Robin or the sudden appearance of a familiar scent.
But I feel that if my Mum was here she’d be more obvious. She’d give me a sign that would leave me with no doubt that she was here. Maybe she’d leave a note, let me hear her voice one more time. I don’t want subtle, I want smack me in the face obvious!
Is the end really the end?
And then I wonder if there is no life after death, if once our body is gone we are just one with the Earth and there is no coming back from that, no ability to communicate with those we leave behind.
In honestly, I want her to be at peace but this does not stop me wondering all the time.
I wonder if she will be there waiting for me, or if she will come and get me when it is my time or I wonder if she is watching over someone else. Dad has said before he has heard her call him when he has been asleep, but as clear as if she was right there next to him. And F has been unsettled at night because he feels someone is watching him in his room.
But still I’ve not felt or seen anything at all.
Does it matter?
And now I understand that it doesn’t matter where they go, it’s how we choose to remember them that really counts.
When I had to pull over in the car to take a picture of a triple rainbow, I knew it was Mum.
She’s in the beautiful sunrises that she loved, and she is watching the sky fade to pink in the evening.
She is her favourite song on the radio or her favourite film on the TV.
She is the full moon, shining bright in the sky. She is the light in my darkness.
And realising this is all I need for now. She can’t be here with me in body but she will forever be with me.
What do you think about the afterlife, Do we go anywhere, do we stay? Have you had a visit from a loved one at all?
It is such a big question we just can't find the answer to. Take comfort in that she will always be with you in spirit like you said x
Its such a huge thing to think about. I love the film Coco and the concept that once a year those who have passed come back and visit their families.
It’s so true that how we choose to remember them is what matters most.
This is a lovely post – very thought-provoking. I'm sure your mum is everywhere you want her to be, and I expect she lives on through you too. (Anita Faulkner – Brazen Mummy Writes)
Thank you Rachel, now I’ve realised that I feel her more x
I’d love that, such a great film as well x
I’ll always make sure she lives on through us all
Thank you Anita, I just want her to be at peace but to be with us all when we need her the most x
This is so precious. The feeling you have while sensing the presense of your Mum…..your words capture it so beautifully. While reading your post all could think about was song I love by Lonestar called \”I am already there\” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k1yTWauVjwo
I've found this a tough read, because it's a bit close to home. I'm not religious and I lost my Dad last year. I don't believe in heaven but I'm really struggling to think of Dad just not existing anymore. I've found myself envious of those with faith. I look for signs…my Dad loved nature and I think if him when I feel and see the seasons start to change.
Thank you, thats a lovely song x
Oh Emma, I am so sorry for your loss. I know exactly what you mean though, I'd love to think there was something more after this life. But I will continue to look for my Mum in all i do x
I believe my dad visits my garden as a Magpie. It gives me great comfort to be able to tell him about my day. Grief is a funny thing in so many ways. Lovely post.
Thank you. What a lovely idea. Weirdly whenever I see a magpie I always think of Mum because she’d always say hello Mr Magpie when she saw one x
It will always be one of life’s eternal questions won’t it. I think we have to put our beliefs in whatever we can take comfort in and that will be different for everyone. I know if the afterlife is what it’s portrayed as no-one has ever come back and tapped me on the shoulder and said “I’m ok” but I think we would have to be naive to think there wasn’t something / somewhere else. I read / saw something once about the “white light”. How the light you are told to go towards when you are leaving is actually the light in the delivery room where you are born again and I really love this thought. But as I’ve said grief isn’t a one size fits all thing so just do you xoxo
That’s actually a really lovely thought x
Grief can be crippling can’t it? I think it’s difficult to find the right words as it’s such an individual journey. I’m not particularly religious but I like to think there’s something somewhere waiting for us
I’m sorry for your loss
Very beautiful piece! I relate to your words so much, and agree with your conclusion. Our loved ones will always be our loved ones, and how we remember them is what helps them carry us through though times. I also lost my mom at an early age, but still sometimes find myself having internal conversations with her.
Sorry for your loss. It never goes away really does it, we just change our approach to it x